The (mainstream) Blogger: Part II

8:49 PM


THE
(mainstream)
BLOGGER
Part II

MICHAEL KORS Bracelet, HERMES Leather bracelet, J CREW leather bracelet, CASIO gold vintage watch, CHANEL vintage bag, AY NOT DEAD black skinny jeans, CELINE T-shirt, NEW BALANCE sneakers, RAY BAN sunglasses.

If you read the first part, you are ready to this (parody).

Here it is the 5-steps guide to be a mainstream blogger:

1. The "Lost boy" pose: It is really important to always look at some point. Never straight to the camera lens. Like the most interesting thing in the world is happening but doesn't take all your attention - because you are the MOST interesting thing in the planet.  Never stop walking, Never Smile.

2. Head accessories: Fedora hats or shades. No choices here. It doesn't matter where you are, whether having a cup of tea with your friends or partying in the hottest club.

3. Arm Candy: the more and the shinier the better. The trend is growing exponential as well as the number of bracelets in your arm. Unless you have a Collier de Chien, let it speak by itself. There's an IMPORTANT rule: the net worth of all your bracelets in one hand must be balanced with a clutch/bag of the same value. 

4. The pricey bag: Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the most important part of your outfit. All your status, style and family income is measured in this bag. Choose wisely. From a Louis Vuitton to Hermes, everything is valid! No matter if you are spotted in McDonalds or in the Palace of Versailles, it will always be with style if a Birkin is next to you. 

5. The flashy sneakers: When you think we are almost done, the sneakers come into the scene. What is the correct sneaker pair to match your look? None. Just pick the most colorful, Picasso pattern and- yes! - shiny footwear you can get from your closet (see the sneaker fever)! If you DIY: great! High tops: double boost to your outfit. If you are blinding the people in the streets, you nailed it.


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